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Post by REDEFINE Pro on May 17, 2015 2:14:30 GMT
Singles Match: Ian Wright vs Ryan Kidd
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Post by Ian Wright on May 17, 2015 15:16:00 GMT
EXT. PARKING LOT - SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA - AFTERNOON We open inside of a chain store parking lot located in Southern California. Although it is normal business hours, a group of skaters have claimed the lot as their own, making it uncomfortable for local elderly patrons. The hard punk sounds of Pennywise drown out any sense of peace in the parking lot. In the background, we see a flock of teens standing near the curb, drinking from bottles wrapped in brown paper bags.
We track a teen on a skateboard wearing a Bad Religion t-shirt.
The skater passes a man with a contemptuous look on his face, who shakes his head in disgust. This man is newly signed 2CW "Righteous" Ian Wright, who turns to the camera. IAN WRIGHT And so it begins. Saturday, May 23, 2015. They call it Redefine. You can bet your A-Double-Dollar-Signs we're gonna redefine a whole lot of things around here. We're gonna redefine what is acceptable behavior in Second City-- what is acceptable behavior in my city. Because I'm telling you right now: I will not allow my tranquil hometown of Elmwood Park, Illinois to be turned into....this.
As Ian utters these words, he holds his arms out in display of his surroundings. By sheer coincidence, as Ian does so, the Bad Religion Skater rolls by at a furious speed, and is inadvertently clotheslined by Ian's extended arm.
Ian observes the wiped out skater, aghast at the sight of his t-shirt:
Ian looks into the camera, shaking his head, while holding his hand out toward the fallen skater, as if he represents "Exhibit A" to the point that the Righteous One is making.
IAN WRIGHT Ryan Kidd, I am told that this is your...scene. Extreme sports and anti-establishment music. Well I'm here to tell you-- not on my watch. Kidd-- if you were my kid, I would have laid you over my knee years ago and spanked to bleach out of your hair. Kidd, know this: I am the conformity that you and your followers oppose; I am the "machine" that you and your miscreants rage against; I am the establishment, the man, the model for decent living; and I represent a whole host of hardworking citizens that want you the H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks out of our community. Ian begins walking through the parking lot, still addressing the camera. He passes the teens drinking alcohol. Without missing a beat, he snatches a 40 ounce from one of their hands and keeps walking, chucking it in a nearby trash bin; while continuing with his rant into the camera.
IAN WRIGHT Kidd, it's clear to me that some of you need some more Jesus in your life. Well it's equally clear to me that some of you need some more Ian in your life. Come next Saturday, I am gonna teach you and your anti-establishment followers a lesson: conformity is a good thing, when Ian Wright is your your template. That is the Wright Way.
FADE TO BLACK
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